Christmas is over; the holidays have run their glistening, opulent, waste-expanding course. Now it is time to resume the routine--time to box up the last vestiges of green, gold, and red, and hide them away with other seasonal memories. Alas, there is one decoration that is more cumbersome than the rest. I speak, of course, of the Christmas tree.
With this winter's temperature drop, and the corresponding rise of my electric bill, I found myself wandering along the outskirts of the woods for dry sticks and fallen trees--free fuel. One evening, as I carried an armload of rotting wood up to our apartment I had an epiphany: Christmas trees are made of wood! Why not burn the Christmas tree? It is an energy efficient, hassle-free, money-saving, green solution!
Here what you will need:
1. Last year's calendar
2. A Nat King Cole Christmas Album featuring the holiday favorite: O Tannenbaum
3. Pruning shears
4. A handsaw
5. A wood burning fireplace or stove
Begin by removing all decorations and lights from the tree. This process can be made easier by trimming the branches from the tree as you proceed.
It is helpful to store these in a box as they await their destiny.
As you progress it will become necessary to saw the trunk into smaller sections.
Start a fire in the stove or fireplace using last year's calendar or datebook. What better way to leave 2011 behind?
Once the fire is of sufficient strength toss in the pieces of trunk. After that, you can begin to burn the lush branches.
Eventually you will have a roaring fire, cathartically releasing the last remnants of Christmas cheer into free, house-warming energy.
Sit beside the fire, drink hot chocolate, and play the King's O Tannenbaum as you and the family enjoy the show.
Johan du Toit's album "
